the unconscious mind reveals itself

When I was eleven, I developed a phobia about being buried alive. Freud said that the fear of being buried alive is a distorted desire to return to the womb, but my friend Louise who was schitzophrenic said that obviously it’s the fear of being out of anyone’s reach and beyond their concern.

flowers from little girls

The little girls next door are selling flowers and when a man in a red van responds to their calls by stopping, I slow down and note his license plate number, just in case, and one of their mothers comes outside to stand on the porch, pretending to have business there. I feel sorry for men and I feel sorry for mothers and for children and all of us, living in a world where a man can’t simply stop to buy a flower from a little girl.